Got hamboned one night and went streaking with my friends sister whose apparently a lot younger than me. Age is just a number. He will never know. TBM.

Went to Coolerpalooza with my lucky cooler. Someone stole it. Woke up with two identical ones...neither which were mine. TBM.

Filled up my empty bottle of grey goose with burnettes. All the girls were impressed. TBM.

Every time I get blackout I call my mom telling her i'm dying. she used to worry but now she gets me to hand the phone over to my boyfriend and she tells him to put me to bed. TBM.

Got so drunk I woke up with a large puddle of piss on my floor. TBM.

Told her I couldn't use protection cause I'm allergic to latex. TBM.

At our Techno Tuesday rave I turned off the music and stood up on a table and yelled if your not attractive or you don't put out then you have to leave. Then pointed to a fat girl an said that means you leave. TBM.

Got a text from someone named "ferrell" saying they had fun with me last night and wants to hang out again. I'm not sure if ferrell is a guy or girl. TBM.

Raging on Franklin street during Halloween and telling a 6' 8" 250 lb man dressed up as Jackie Moon to lick my ball sack and hit me as hard as he can before I drag his ass up and down the street. TBM.

My cousins were in town from Florida and my friends and I wanted to show them a good time. We got two hotel rooms downtown, grabbed some beer/liquor, scooped the 18 year old brother and headed down to pre-game. After being forced fed shots of Goose we headed to the club. When 2am hit and the club closed we did the usual and headed to the strip club for the all you can eat breakfast. As the taxi pulls into the parking lot my little brother pukes all over the back floor. We all get out and the driver demands $50. I decided I'd pay him something else...a punch to his chest...